So Im going to start by making kindof a bold statement....One of the things I dislike the most about the blogging world is all the bloggers out there that pretend to be something they are not. They put on the sweet smile and blog about their wonderful perfect lives and its only the people that know them best that know that its a big fat lie!! I try not to judge but it is truely sad when I think about the lives that are torn apart and the families that struggle because of lies and deciet! With that being said....I will make a confession.....
Im sure all of you at one time or another has felt those feelings of being totally overwelmed and feeling like you have no control over your life....right?? Well thats what the last few years of my life has felt like! Through all the busyness of kids, work, and everyday life I found myself... not hitting rock bottom necessarily, but at a point where I felt my faith being tested. One thing I think I have been faced with on a daily basis is learning to trust in God no matter the circumstances. Trusting and letting go when you find yourself in circumstance you never expected and you feel as though your world is caving in, is so much easier said than done. I’ve always been the type of person that when a situation arises and falls apart, I try to be strong and put all the puzzle pieces back together. So many times I try to perfectly meet the expectations of others, of the world and of my own…only to soon realize no mater how tall I try to stand, I can’t reach them. I find myself saying over and over... "I truly believe in the power of prayer”…only to quickly find my own words hitting me like a huge brick. Do I really believe?As I sit.. struggling…holding on to hurt and frustration…rather than letting it go and finding refuge and strength in a God that is faithful. I need to wipe away the tears and admit I have no idea how to put the broken pieces back together, but trust and believe He has plan…no matter how long it may take for the plan to all come together. Have faith. Trust. Trust that He’s able to do what I only see as the impossible. HE knows me, HE knows my heart, and HE knows what is best for me!
I’m still learning.
I feel like I have my priorities in order and I know what is most important! MY Family is #1! The saying blood is thicker than water is sooo true! When you have no one else... you still have your family!! I have found the friends that I know are Truely friends! Not the ones you have to call everyday to check in, not the ones that judge, not the ones that don't understand what you are going through and think that their problems are bigger and worse than yours! Not the ones that pretend to be your friend and stab you in the back!!
True friends are those that you could not talk to for 6 months and pick right up where you left off. Ones that know that even though they have big things going on in their lives that yours are just as big in your eyes! Friends are those that stand beside you in spirit and let you know that they are their for you no matter what the circumstances are and most important they are the ones that are your voice when you cant seem to find your own! They are your biggest fans and root for you to make it to the end!! They are the ones that make you want to be a better person and lift you up when you are down!
I've read this saying before...“Simplicity is the secret to seeing things clearly.” Worrying brings confusion, obedience beings clarification. I need to obey and trust. So simple and yet still so difficult. Regardless of difficulty, being able to “let go and move on and have faith” brings about a peacefulness I so desperately need…just one of His small blessings!!
I am working on some things right now that I think will bring a peace I have never known. Im in a good place now... Im happy...My Family is Happy and I am ready to see where we go from here!
Wow that was blunt and kindof forward but it did feel good to just say it! Im usually not a confrontational person at all but that kinda came out that way! MMMMMM.... sorry if i offended anyone!
Now on to buisness.... here is the happiest baby i have seen in a very long time! He is sweet and so is his mama! She is one of my dear dear friends and i am so blessed to have her in my life!
